You Get What You Ask For!
Dr. Linda Hancock
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Dr. Hancock has written a regular weekly column entitled “All Psyched Up” for newspapers in two Canadian provinces for more than a dozen years. Over the years, her readers and clients have said that they have benefited from her common-sense solutions, wisdom, and sense of humour. Dr. Linda Hancock, the author of “Life is An Adventure…every step of the way” and “Open for Business Success” is a Registered Psychologist who has a private practice in Medicine Hat. She can be reached at 403-529-6877 or through email office@drlindahancock.com
Published
August 11 2010
All Psyched Up. | | You Get What You Ask For! | by Dr. Linda Hancock | Published August 11 2010 | Revised July 25 2022
© 2022, Dr. Linda Hancock INC.
Have you ever noticed that people often seem to be able predict situations and or events that will happen to them in the future?
Clients frequently make statements and then are surprised when the things that they don't want (but talk about) do happen. Those who claim "I can't sleep" are annoyed and surprised by the fact that their insomnia occurs year after year after year.
Your brain is just like a giant and amazingly powerful computer. Think about what happens when you type words into an internet search engine. You get what you want! Type the word "psychologist" into a search engine. Immediately you will receive hundreds of links that provide information about psychologists. Where they train, the various theories that they use, how to contact one in your area. You get what you ask for!
Don't think about elephants. Don't think about elephants. Don't think about elephants. What are you thinking about? Elephants, right? You see words cause you to focus on a certain thing or idea.
What words that you are saying out loud to yourself and others?
When you say things like "I'll probably get fired", "This relationship won't work", or "My child will never do well", you are inviting trouble into your life.
We are not talking about some strange type of magical trick. We're just talking about the power that positive affirmations have in your life.
When you say what you want, possibilities open up that would otherwise be lost. Saying "I am going to go to work and will do my best so that I can serve the customers and maintain my employment" you are probably helping to create a better future than merely saying "I'll probably get fired".
"This relationship won't work" dooms any chance of resolving issues.
"My child will never do well" kills expectations and gives your child the idea that no one believes in him/her so there is no point in trying.
It takes time and commitment to learn to speak a new language. Your self-talk is a type of language that you use to communicate with yourself. You will need to practice focusing on and talking about the things you want instead of the things you don't want for the future.
Begin by getting a package of small recipe cards. On each, write a positive statement in the present tense about something that you truly want to happen. You might write "Every day I am learning how to handle stress better" or "I am becoming known as an encourager" or "My focus is on making healthy choices".
Once you have several cards, put them in places that you will see them often - one on your bathroom mirror, one in your car, one near your computer. You might choose to have a few in your purse or pocket so that you can read them while waiting for an appointment to begin or during a short break in the day.
Be reasonable. This is not about wishing for a brand-new car to fall from the sky. It is about self-improvement.
Over time you will start noticing the differences in your life. You will feel better, be more attractive to others and start to notice positive changes in thinking and actions.
What have you got to lose? Nothing really - because right now you are getting what you are asking for and those are the things you really don't want anyway.
Oh, and linking this with a few more strategies, you will likely find that you are getting more sleep each night.
Why not book an appointment with a psychologist today so that you begin developing some skills and make choices that will improve areas of your life?
Think about it and start saying what you want.
"I want to learn more about improving my life".
All Psyched Up. | The Fifth Year | You Get What You Ask For! | by Dr. Linda Hancock | Published August 11 2010 | Revised July 25 2022
© 2022, Dr. Linda Hancock INC.