You Can Choose

Often, I hear individuals complain about a situation in life that they do not like. It might involve their relationships, career, finances or perhaps events occurring in various places throughout the world. They seem to think that talking about how they are suffering will make things better. It won't!

If you are struggling, there are things that you can do. Here are your choices:

1. Protect yourself from information involving world catastrophes - If you are anxious about weather systems or traumatic events that are happening in other locations you would probably be wise to turn off the television and internet. There isn't anything that you can do about these things and filling your mind with doom and gloom with just negatively impacts your well-being.
2. Wallow in your personal misery - If you want to just sit and commiserate without taking action, chances are that nothing will get resolved. Fretting about family conflict, finances or your career could end up causing you both physical and mental pain. I remember a children's book that I would read to my children when they were young. One of the main characters was Fred Flintstone. He was trying to help an acquaintance who was always miserable. At the end of the story Fred came to the conclusion that some people just aren't happy unless they are miserable! Hopefully that won't be you!
3. Do nothing about the problem but change your attitude - Perhaps you are not prepared to take action but can learn to accept the problems without angst. Many people put one foot in front of the other for years and years in jobs that they do not love. They won't consider making a change but continue on without complaint because they feel that they are receiving financial benefits and don't have better options. Others stay in relationships where they aren't happy but honour the commitment they made to stay married without complaining aloud.
4. Research and form a plan to create change - Perhaps you need to speak with someone who has expertise in the area where you are struggling. Reaching out to an objective party could be exactly the thing that will help you deal with the problems you have been experiencing. Maybe you will enroll in an education program, work with a financial planner or discuss your psychological problems with a therapist. Gathering information will give you a much broader perspective.
5. Make change happen! The day that you begin to take action, things begin to change. That doesn't mean that everything will immediately be perfect but the chances of coming to a better place in life are optimized. One step at a time you will begin to notice things. Adopting a new menu will lead to your clothes fitting better. Spending less than you earn will quickly begin a path to financial health. Cleaning one drawer will begin a process for organizing your life!

You can choose what your future will look like. Which of the above choices will you make?

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From Dr. Linda Hancock, Registered Psychologist and Registered Social Worker