What Are the Three Ingredients That Form a Good Friendship?

What Are the Three Ingredients That Form a Good Friendship?

Dr. Linda Hancock

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Dr. Hancock has written a regular weekly column entitled “All Psyched Up” for newspapers in two Canadian provinces for more than a dozen years. Over the years, her readers and clients have said that they have benefited from her common-sense solutions, wisdom, and sense of humour. Dr. Linda Hancock, the author of “Life is An Adventure…every step of the way” and “Open for Business Success” is a Registered Psychologist who has a private practice in Medicine Hat. She can be reached at 403-529-6877 or through email office@drlindahancock.com

Published

March 13 2009

There are many definitions for the word "friend" but those relationships that have three ingredients are the most satisfying. This article describes the things that turn acquaintances into good friends.

Three things that will help you measure the value of a friendship are:

To KNOW them - It takes time to get to know the interests, patterns, and character of another person. You cannot know anything or anyone unless you are willing to ask good questions, be observant and invest in that person. When you share thoughts, feelings, and activities, you are able to learn about the other person.
To LIKE a person means that you enjoy the and want to be with the other person. I am always surprised to hear people complain about their "friends" who they obviously do not like. When there are six billion people in the world, you do not need to try to develop friendships with people that you do not like.
To TRUST is to have confidence that the other person will do what they say they will do, protect your reputation, consider your needs and be honest. It is NOT friendship when someone is nasty or mean. In fact, people who feel good about themselves do not hurt other people.

Friendship requires commitment and work. It is therefore important that you are developing mutually beneficial relationships with people who are healthy and able to contribute.

I challenge you to measure your current relationships on this three-pronged standard and build new relationships with them in mind.