Trauma And Loss

Trauma And Loss

Dr. Linda Hancock

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Dr. Hancock has written a regular weekly column entitled “All Psyched Up” for newspapers in two Canadian provinces for more than a dozen years. Over the years, her readers and clients have said that they have benefited from her common-sense solutions, wisdom, and sense of humour. Dr. Linda Hancock, the author of “Life is An Adventure…every step of the way” and “Open for Business Success” is a Registered Psychologist who has a private practice in Medicine Hat. She can be reached at 403-529-6877 or through email office@drlindahancock.com

Published

May 26 2025

They say that the shoemaker’s kids are barefoot! Well, since my accident last year when I fell 40 feet headfirst down an escalator at the Calgary Airport and then, in January, had cataract surgery which resulted in a very slow recovery, I was surprised to realize that I have been in mourning for my physical losses and experiencing grief.

So, this week I will write about how to assess and understand what you might be going through too. Next week will give you some ways to deal with the symptoms and heal.

People who encountered a death, non-death, loss or crisis might experience the following:

Strong Emotions	Shock, Denial or Disbelief Fear Anger, irritability or mood swings Helplessness or feelings of overwhelm Anxiety Numbness Sadness or Depression Guilt or shame
Physical Ailments	Headaches, Pains Sore muscles or tension Lack of Appetite Lethargy or Fatigue Change in sleep patterns (trouble falling or staying asleep, nightmares) Disinterest or inability sexually Panic symptoms that might be similar to heart attack (sweating, pounding in chest)
Mental Issues	Lack of Focus Temporary Memory problems Difficulty concentrating Repeated thoughts about what happened (rumination) Feeling strange and alone even when surrounded by others Losing trust Re-experiencing images over and over – trying to make sense of them (flashbacks)
Relationship/Social Change	Lack of desire to talk or be with others Avoidance of places or people who remind you of what happened Losing interest in activities that you usually enjoyed in the past Isolating yourself from others Acting defensive when it is not necessary Vengeful – wanting “someone” to do “something” to resolve things
Behavioural Changes	Turning to alcohol, drugs or other habits to escape Becoming argumentative or aggressive Lacking confidence Being unsure how to move back into routine Over-reacting or trying to do more than necessary to prevent future problems Exaggerated startle response Trouble getting to sleep or staying asleep, nightmares.
Spiritual	Losing faith in God or life Trying to figure out things that don’t have an explanation Blaming

Everyone reacts differently to situations, and you therefore cannot expect to be the same as the other people who have had the same experience that you just went through.

You might think that you are “going crazy” or “unable to cope with things” the way that you might expect or hope.

Remember, there is no “normal” in life – we all tend to think there is and that can be confusing. Normal is a setting on the dryer!

Next week … ways to deal with the symptoms and heal.