You can spend a whole lifetime building a good reputation and then lose it in a matter of minutes! And often the things that lead to ruin are things that we never, ever thought others would find out about.
Secrets usually don't remain secrets long-term. The dysfunctional things that we think we can hide usually show up in time despite our efforts to conceal them. This is especially true now that technology has allowed everyone with a phone to making video recordings, view your communications and even hack your accounts.
Well, if you want to be safe, make sure you never do or say anything that you wouldn't want to show up as the headline of a newspaper.
Here are some of the things that you might be hiding that will likely hurt your reputation:
1. Lies - People learn to trust you when they know that you will consistently tell them the truth. Once you start exaggerating or skewing facts, you will begin forming a pattern that others will soon recognize. Unfortunately, some individuals have been in denial about the truth for so long that they don't even know they are lying to themselves let alone to others. Tell one lie and then you have to tell another to cover it up, and then another. It is far easier to tell the truth because then you don't have to try to remember all the lies you have created.
2. Financial irresponsibility - You can only make excuses about financial recklessness for a short period of time, before you lose your personal credibility and good standing with others. Not paying your bills on time will also cost you in interest and penalties. Make a good plan that includes spending less than you earn and paying off your debt. You will be surprised about how quickly you can improve your situation when you are committed to do this.
3. Addictions - Substance and process abuse with food, sex, computers and gambling can lead to increased tolerance and addiction over time. I have never heard about anyone who started using with a plan to become addicted. They just want to feel better and then get hooked. Soon the addiction starts stealing their money, time and ability to make healthy choices. Fortunately, there are many resources to help those who are motivated to deal will their addictions.
4. Affairs - It is very difficult to hide the fact that you are cheating on your partner. You may be having a wonderful time enjoying a honeymoon phase of the new relationship. The fact that you are trying to keep it a secret implies that you know others will be hurt if they know what you are up to. Time to get honest with yourself! You will get caught. Your denial or promises to change will not be believed.
5. Stealing - Borrowing things without asking permission from the owner, is theft. When you take things from others, even if you do not have any legal consequences for doing so, you will result in loss of result and trust.
6. Abusing others - Controlling others physically, mentally, sexually or financially for your own benefit is immoral, unethical and will usually have legal consequences.
Have you ever tried to hold a beachball under water? It takes so much energy to hold it down that eventually it pops up and out of your control! It is the same thing with secrets.
If you are involved in activities that are going to destroy your reputation, it is time to get some professional help. Psychologists are trained to help clients to problem-solve and make healthy choices. The first step for learning how to rebuild your reputation is to book an appointment today!