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Get Your House in Order
A New Beginning
Success in the Work World
Time Marches On
Change Changes Us
The Simple Life
Grief and Loss
What Stage are you In?
Dealing with Tigers
What is Stupid
Are You Worried?
Life's a Puzzle
Let's Sing Along!
Navigating the Journey
Confidence for the New Year
When you say that you have confidence in someone or something it generally means that you trust your expectations will be met. There are many, many different things in which we can be confident. For example, the sun will come up in the morning and set in the evening every day without fail. Telling lies over time will result in negative consequences for the future. Small children who are fed and cared for will grow. Genuine friends will support us.
It's interesting to know that some people have confidence in a variety of things and other people but not in themselves. They talk about how they have missed opportunities or felt sad because they just don't trust themselves to succeed.
There are a number of reasons why people do not feel confident:
They feel they don't have skills- Spending time thinking about what you don't have can stop you from developing skills. Sign up for a course, read a couple of books and practice so that you can celebrate expertise instead of lack.
They have failed in the past and think this is a life pattern- Change is possible at any moment in time. Just because you aren't where you want to be doesn't mean you can't move forward. Make a plan and put one foot in front of another while focusing on your goal.
Others have told them they won't succeed and they believe that as truth- Everyone has opinions about things but that doesn't mean that they are accurate - or shared. Decide that you will succeed and ignore those who disagree. Or better yet, use their words to spur you on!
They never consider their accomplishments- Make a list of all the things that you have done. Then ask friends and family for ideas to expand the list. Think of compliments or encouraging words that you have received since childhood and write those down. You will likely be surprised by the beautiful testimonial that you have created!
They don't try so never have a chance to feel confident - There is an old adage that states "A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step". If you never begin then you will never succeed but if you will just try you have an excellent chance of making progress.
They focus on the negative- It always amazes me that people talk about what they don't want instead of what they do want. Listen to the words you use. Pay attention to your thoughts. Do you really want the things that you are saying and thinking about? If not, know that you have the power to make a positive change.
We are standing on the threshold of a new year. I have confidence that twelve months from now we will be doing the same thing.
Do you have confidence that you will be able to enjoy personal growth, trust yourself and attempt new adventures this year?
If not, consider making an appointment with a Registered Psychologist who will help you to plan how you can achieve what you really, truly want deep down in your heart.
Happy New Year, everyone!
About the Author
Dr. Hancock has written a regular weekly column entitled “All Psyched Up” for newspapers in two Canadian provinces for more than a dozen years...